My perfect day in London…

It starts with a lie-in. These days, that’s 8am – because my daughter is usually up at 6am, waking me with a boot to the face or an elbow in my eye socket. A loving one, obviously, but if I make it to 8, I’m thrilled. I’ll get up and cook breakfast – scrambled eggs, which I’ve properly nailed over the years. I’m very confident about my scrambled eggs. Then we’ll go for a walk, do something vaguely wholesome, but really it’s just about getting through as much of the day as possible before I crack and go to the pub. I think 11am is acceptable. Once it hits 11, you can have a pint. I’ll go for a Guinness – it’s a strong first pint, almost like a brunch drink. At this point, I’m either still with my family or I’ve quietly gone off to the pub on my own and I’m texting them pretending I’m working: “On set”, “in a meeting” – when actually I’m just sitting there drinking Guinness. That continues until about 5pm. Then I come home for bathtime and help put my daughter to bed. So yeah – it’s basically a day of me drinking Guinness on my own from 11 until 5.

The area that best describes me…

I’d like to say Notting Hill. I think most people would say Mayfair, which is just ‘wanker’. Notting Hill is also ‘wanker’, but with a slightly more bohemian edge, so I’m going with that.

Favourite pub…

I like the Cock & Bottle. That’s a good one. I also like the Walmer Castle, unless it’s absolutely rammed. I don’t really like drinking Guinness on the street, shoulder to shoulder. I’d rather have a seat. Also, ideally, I’m on my own. That’s quite key.