Bear Grylls On Failure, Resilience & Other Life Lessons
My late father was a huge positive influence on me throughout my childhood. He was a former Royal Marines Commando, a climber, and always there for me as a dad. He not only taught me a lot of survival stuff and how to climb, but also that it’s important to go for things in life and not to be scared to go all in. My wife, Shara, and I were in our early 20s and newly married when we both lost our fathers. That really hit us hard. Looking back now, although I felt so young at the time, I realise my dad had equipped me with many core values. He said to me, ‘I don’t care about school reports. What I care about is the effort. Are you trying your best? Are you being kind? Are you treating people with respect?’ I look back on that now as a father of three boys and I see he was right about so much. I feel sad that I never got the chance to thank him properly.
My first major expedition was climbing Ama Dablam in the Himalayas, a peak once described by Sir Edmund Hillary as ‘unclimbable’. It opened the door for me to attempt Everest the following year. Eventually standing on the world’s highest peak was a big life moment. The summit itself was tiny – like a coffee table on the roof of the world. It had taken us 93 days to reach. The images of watching the sunrise over Tibet are locked in my brain forever. That expedition changed me in so many ways, and during that time the mountain claimed four climbers’ lives. That was hard to come to terms with, but through it all I found a gratitude for life that lasts to this day.
I have failed so much in my life, more than you would ever imagine. For example, there was my attempt to fly a powered paraglider over the remote jungles of Venezuela and over the Angel Falls. We faced a harsh rebuff and were fortunate to escape with our lives. It was an important lesson – that we always learn more from our failures than our successes. I have such a long list of these sort of failures, but I have always tried to keep going and try again. Another example is when I failed SAS selection the first time. I was completely gutted after giving so much. But I applied again and got it second time round. That was all the sweeter. I was also so much better equipped. As I often say, improvise, adapt, overcome. People tend to remember us for the successes not the failures; they often don’t realise how many failures it took to reach the wins. But I am proud of them, I wear them like scars, and I’m aware that they’ve been vital gateways to getting to the good stuff.
To stay calm and focused in challenging conditions, you need to adopt a survivor mindset to never give up. Our greatest tool is our dogged determination to not give in when the battles and storms come. You need tenacity – a dogged determination to keep going despite the overwhelming odds. That spirit is key to so much in life, and in terms of survival it is fundamental. Ultimately, it matters more than any amount of knowledge or skills. Resilience is a muscle that gets stronger when worked over time and that fire is inside us all if we only dig deep enough to uncover it. Pair that with kindness to those around you in tough situations, plus courage in the big moments, and you have the winning ingredients for the wild and life.
Adaptability is also key. Having good listening skills and being able to pivot and adapt as things happen will get you far. There has obviously been a fair amount of risk involved in my work, and that has resulted in quite a few close calls that have almost had the better of me, but I try always to get smarter and to listen to that inner voice. Plus, I am grateful for some luck along the way. But you have to be tenacious enough to get the luck. I am pretty considered nowadays in how I approach risks, especially with guests on our TV shows.
ANIMALS ON THE LOOSE, NETFLIX
The wild exposes us wide open. We can’t hide, and that’s the pain but also the magic. I have seen the most unlikely heroes emerge, and those we might think invincible often crumble. The hardships and the camaraderie that you share when you are up against it in the wild strips the fluff away and allows for some beautifully honest human connections. Surprising lesson number one is that we are more capable than we often give ourselves credit for, and that we are at our best when under pressure. When you learn to embrace that, you become it.
When we constantly avoid our fears, they tend to get bigger. Then, when someone is thrown into a scary situation, they’re not used to it. Then you get an overload of adrenaline, which is hard to control. Managing fear is a big part of my life. It always has been, from the early days of learning to climb with my dad as a kid. It was always about trying to get used to fear and trying to not be overwhelmed by it. I’ve learnt to almost become friends with fear and to understand that actually, it isn't an enemy. It's something that nature gives you, so you can stay sharp and perform well when it matters.
Courage isn’t the absence of fear. It’s our ability to deal with it. We can all do this in our day-to-day lives, by doing small things that challenge us. It will ultimately lead to confidence in handling difficult feelings and sharing our struggle with trusted friends.
Taking risks is good because it stretches us and that is how we grow – but it has to be well managed. You only get it wrong once. I have developed a good instinct of what is smart to do and what is not, and I try to listen to that voice. Risk is part of all of our lives, and the more we practise dealing with danger and risk, the better we become at handling it. If we have no experience of risk, then when it comes it often overwhelms us. Doing something challenging every day, even a cold shower for example, starts to train us to deal with challenge. That's the start of true empowerment. Taking risks and handling danger is a muscle and we have to train it.
Leadership isn’t about being the strongest, fittest or cleverest. It's much more about being kind and having courage. Make sure your team knows you have their backs, that you lead by example by taking on the hardest tasks yourself, and never give up. Show kindness every day and muster courage in the big, challenging moments.
Every morning, I wake up and take the dogs for a walk – barefoot if I can. Then, I’ll have a stretch session, which is also a chance to say my prayers for the day: to say thank you for all the things I’m grateful for, and sorry for the less-than-good stuff I’ve done. Then it’s time to get the training done. I’ve got some weights and an outdoor rig, and I’ll do a half-hour weights workout every other day, and a swim or sprints on the other days. I also try to get cold most days. If I’m near a river and it’s winter, I’ll get in. Otherwise, I’ve got a chest freezer that I’ve lined with silicon and rigged up with a circuit breaker, so it turns off when it gets to 2°C. I’m in there for three minutes. Over the years I've learned how to look after my body, how to train, and how not to overtrain. I like to fast for about 12-14 hours each day and always start the morning with good-quality salt and electrolytes. Breakfast is usually five eggs, raw milk and honey, and a mushroom Dirtea coffee, then I’m good to go. All in, my morning routine takes about 60-90 minutes.
Animals On The Loose, Netflix
I was vegan for about five years and ate no red meat for another five, but I found it was an error for my health. I had Covid pretty badly right at the beginning, and doubled down on what I thought was good health. I had lots of raw broccoli, celery and other greens in my smoothies, but my kidneys started to get really painful. Meanwhile, my eldest son was in the same boat and had been struggling with his energy, skin and stomach. He consulted top nutritionist Paul Saladino and others in America, and quickly regained great health and good skin by eating grass-fed red meat, salted butter, eggs, fruit, and honey, while cutting out bread, pasta and processed foods. I couldn’t believe the transformation. I copied him and the same transformation happened to me. And my kidneys and overall health quickly improved. Now, my favourite foods are eggs, grass-fed beef burgers, good quality cheese, and maybe a homemade Dirtea cacao mousse.
Being active and being outdoors can be transformational for our mental and physical health. The outdoors challenges us and heals us. It gives an inner confidence and often puts things into perspective. Cold water helps me maintain mental strength. Having good friends help me so much too. Being able to share the struggles and talk things over is really important. Eating naturally is also part of it, as is having focused goals and new challenges. I also put time aside to rest, and make time to be still, even while on a train. Just unplugging from social media and breathing can be beneficial. It is why we developed our app Be Mettle, to provide a toolkit for men’s minds.
One of my biggest adventures today is being a father. Our boys are great and to spend time messing about with them doing simple mini-adventures, like swimming in the sea or going for a hike, is the great privilege of my life. All those things make me so happy. My wife Shara isn’t scared of the outdoors and a bit of bad weather, which has been key as we live for part of the year on a remote Welsh island that has no mains electricity or water – and gets a lot of rain.
Humans are creatures of habit, and no one really likes change. But change in life and nature is inevitable, which is why it’s so important to step out of our comfort zones and challenge ourselves. That’s the only way to grow, and it’s how we keep our edge. We are at our best when we have a goal and things to aim for. It’s easy to get intimidated by the idea of failure, which may be why people fear the unknown. However, we need to not see failure as a bad thing but instead see it as a stepping stone. Then change isn’t purely uncomfortable; it becomes the doorway to growth.
My advice to young people is to dream big, go big and fail big. The world is full of dream stealers who will try and shut down your aspirations, but dreams are god given. Treasure them and, most importantly, take active steps towards them. Just keep moving forward – however slow that might be or feel. Positive action changes everything and a winning attitude conquers so much. Know the value of humility, resilience, courage, determination, selflessness and cheerfulness in adversity. Those are all the marks of champions.
Bear is co-owner of Dirtea – the UK’s leading functional mushroom brand. Shop the collection at DirteaWorld.com
Animals On The Loose, Netflix
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